Not Quite Yet

It takes time, trials, and trying again -- but I have been able to keep hitting happy moments/days/weeks.  I have not quite yet been able to find a "forever" type of continuous happiness but most of the time I have been doing alright.  As I mentioned awhile back, I love country music.  One of the many groups I listen to is Rascal Flatts and the lyrics to their song "Stand" helps me on those not-so-great days :)  Am so thankful for the people I have been able to visit with (and for those who live farther away for calling and chatting or sending emails).  And I wasn't quite honest when coming back to this blog -- my health is being insanely frustrating and I have started to schedule various appointments.  It really helps me to create things/do things for others and to be able to spend time with young children (especially my godson and his twin sister!)  So blessed to have my parents and other family/friends who love and support me unconditionally.

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Lyrics to "Stand" by Rascal Flatts (shall try to post the video too)
You feel like a candle in a hurricane
Just like a picture with a broken frame
Alone and helpless
Like you've lost your fight
But you'll be alright, you'll be alright

[Chorus:]
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand, Then you stand
Life's like a novel
With the end ripped out
The edge of a canyon
With only one way down
Take what you're given before its gone
Start holding on, keep holding on

[Repeat Chorus]

Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
Oh

[Repeat Chorus]

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Courage...

Sometimes I do not know how much time has passed. My memory is no longer as reliable as it used to be.  Then time plays tricks on me, perhaps just to make things more...Interesting? A day can feel like a decade or a mere handful of seconds.  My days recently (and by recently I think I mean for the past few months) -- they have mostly been me existing.  I do have times when I am happy and enjoy certain events/people and have good memories, but often it is just me putting one foot in front of the other. I have learned that this is okay -- no, this is better than okay, because I am not giving up.  I keep fighting through the bad days and try to smile when sick.

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes, courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying "I will try again tomorrow."

Every day that I find something good, do something for another person, continue moving (instead of sliding backwards) -- especially the days when I am sick and get through it so I can see the next day -- the wonderful perfect times and the one foot in front of the other times -- it all takes different levels/different types of courage.

Happiness...

So many ups and downs in the past few years -- I wanted to share a quote I have had before I turned my brain off for the night.  Sending support, goodwill, prayers, etc to all ::HUGS::

"Happiness is like a butterfly.
The more you chase it, the more it eludes you.
But if you turn your attention to other things,
It comes and sits softly on your shoulder."
~Henry David Thoreau

Summer Olympics 2012

Growing up I do not recall watching too many television shows -- primarily because I was too busy reading, babysitting for fun (okay, I did charge a little bit but it was still for the fun of playing with kids!), time with my family, and/or time in nature.  The few television shows/movies I do remember were PBS (Mr. Rogers!) and lots of Disney. However, every four years there were the summer Olympics and the winter Olympics (so technically every two years there was a two-three week period of time I watched more television than usual).  Moving on with my ramblings, I wanted to make sure to comment this time around mostly just because I wanted to share a bit more about myself with whomever is reading the post.  Also I pulled two images from Google since the final torch in London created quite a stir this time around.  Unfortunately most of the comments have been negative because it is (apparently?  I do not know from experience) the first time the Olympic Cauldron has not been available for photo opportunities since it is "hidden" from view for everyone actually at the games... Unless you were at the opening ceremony, hold tickets to the track and field events, or will attend the closing ceremonies.  Nevertheless I rambled on about this because I enjoyed, at the very least, how each individual country entered the opening ceremony this year with part of the cauldron along side them. 

Descriptions: The top photo (blue/purple/flames) is of each of the "petals" as they started to rise to form the cauldron; the lower photo (mostly gold/yellow) is of the completed cauldron and the start of the fireworks show that concluded the opening ceremony.


P.S. Oh! I nearly forgot to add that I was able to spend time with "my" France family -- my godson is here in CA and last night I was able to spend a few hours with all of them which was great!! :)

July is almost over!

I really do not know where the time goes... There are so many things to catch up on yet when I go to sit down and type I either find the memories slipping away or reach for them and they have disappeared already!

Let me go back to last summer because I want to include at least two photos here.  The first one is from the pond in the backyard (this year there are so many more water lilies -- but I do not know where I placed the camera so a photo from last year will have to do).  The second photo was taken by a friend during an afternoon trip up to Mono Lake -- last summer I worked for two months up in Mammoth Lakes, CA (helped out at a camp).  Nature is so great, and hopefully these two photos give a glimpse into that beauty:

I might have mentioned there was a wedding on each side of my family this past April (2012)... Perhaps not.  Well I did want to add a photo from each -- the first photo is of my table setting and the second is of the desert table.  Weddings in particular I find to be a great opportunity to catch up with family and friends (as well as a place to make new friends) however I decided to not include any photos of individuals other than myself, simply the quickest of glimpses into both after parties

I have not added too much in the way of information, so I want to be sure to add that overall my health has been doing fine (although I have to work on walking again) and to add the news that my godson and twin sister looked so cute that I have to include one photo of them from this past winter -- and the wonderful news that they are in CA instead of France for the moment!  (Huge reason why trying to write here has not been anywhere near the top of my to do list -- that plus the past two months I have been working at a rec center fairly close to where I live).  Photo sent to me when they were in France, one of the rare "good weather" days towards the end of winter -- hope everyone smiles today!

Hello World...

Possibly a bit difficult to believe, but I forgot that I had started a blog for a couple months!  Then I suppose I let life get in the way.  We are now half-way through another year however, so it is time I posted something!

Where to begin... I am still a bookworm, although I have started watching more tv than I used to.  I have hit some great milestones in terms of my health -- over seven months passed before a minor setback these past two weeks! I have both succeeded and failed when it came to my goal of re-connecting with people.  Some new friends, some re-connecting, yet some lack of connection.  I have also had varying degrees of success when it came to getting out more/taking longer walks/etc.

Special news!  Last fall I went to Europe (specifically to France) to visit my godson and his family!  I had a wonderful time and I am still so very thankful for the unexpected opportunity!

Did intend for this "first blog back" to be much longer, however I am having issues with sleep so this shall have to be the end for the moment... Shall leave two photos however, both of tie-blankets I hand made for people I care about.  Hope to write again soon -- and thank you to all of you who have been sending blog entries out into the world this past year -- when time permits I read them and enjoy learning more about the people who are in this world with me!

Yes, it's April...

Hello all - I know it's April and I haven't written, but I've been busy having fun taking full-time care of my youngest cousin who is now seven months old!  I wanted to attach a photo or two of our adventures together but can't find the darn cord that goes with the camera.  Oh well, another day perhaps...

Not much time to ramble tonight, it's just about my "new bedtime" - but I did want to mention that I am doing a pretty great job keeping up with drinking more water, eating almost all healthy foods daily, and getting more exercise than I anticipated.  It's not much in comparison with most people, but since I had been doing almost zero exercise the first two months of this year I now walk up and down flights of stairs daily, walk around the neighborhood pushing the stroller up and down the hilly streets where my cousin lives, in addition to walking several hundred times around the house and yard - my cousin LOVES to be carried around and so my arms are now used to the 15 (16?) pounds being shifted from one side to the other :)  She is so adorable, I only feel badly that I have yet to spend any significant time with the brand new (well, not brand new anymore!!) baby girl across the street!

Oh, the photo for today was one that another aunt of mine emailed from my cousin's 30th birthday (formal black and white) - which, as I have mentioned before, was my 28th birthday.  I got to see family along with a necklace from my parents and I got myself a few books/dvds which I read/watched very quickly.  Hope everyone is doing well and enjoying life - babies are so much fun!!